FISH! for life

Fish! for Life: A Remarkable Way to Achieve Your Dreams

Stephen C Lundin, John Christensen and Harry Paul



4 Main Ingredients of FISH! Philosophy

1) Play: Carry a light heart with you wherever you go

- How might I be an instrument of lightheartedness?
- Do I have a smile in my heart that is heard in my voice?
- Do I explore all the ways I could bring fun to a task that is not usually fun?
- Do we value fun?
- Do we have fun as friends?
- How do we respond to someone who is always serious?
- Are we able to avoid getting too serious about things that really don't deserve that kind of energy?
- Do we know how to take something seriously while at the same time not taking ourselves too seriously?
- Are we using levity as a way of avoiding real conversations?
- Do we sse the natural joy in life?


2) Make Their Day: Sometimes you can make someone's day simply by the way you engage them

- Whose day will I make today?
- When did someone else last make my day?
- How might the way I live my life be a source of inspiration for others?
- If my life could teach, what would the 1st lesson be?
- What memories did I reate for my children today?
- How will I make someone's day brighter today?
- Who goes unnoticed in my world?
- Is there a way to bring special attention to those who toil in the background of my life?
- What am I doing to make the world a better place?
- What do my children & grandchildren remember about their time with me?
- How might I live my life today so as to be an inspiration to others?
- Have I treated myself to the good feelings generated by serving another?
- Am I open to having someone make my day?


3) Be There: Amazing things happen when you learn how to be where you actually are. Bringing consciousness, body & spirit into the same space is a gift to yourself & to the world

- Where am I right now? Where is my attention? What are the currents wandering through my mind?
- Are my mind and body in the same place?
- Who do I want my attention?
- What is the impact of my 'be there' decision?
- Am I 1 piece at a time, doing 1 thing at a time or do I try to do many things at once?
- Is it true that even if I multitask I can still do only one thing at a time?
- Do people know when my attention is somewhere else?
- What cues can we give one another to promote the now?
- Am I listening to family & friends with the single purpooe of hearing what they have to say?
- Do I give the gift of rapt attention freely?
- Do we have a protocol for dealing with interruptions like the phone during a family meal?
- Have I reminded myself today of how goot it feels to be listened to?



4) Choose Your Attitude: The attitude you've right now is the one you're choosing. Choose as if the quality of your life depends on it, for it actually does, moment-to-moment

- Whare are the attitudes I am choosing right now?
- What attitudes are my favourites?
- What attitudes re most common in my life?
- Do I like those attitudes?
- How do I shift from 1 attttude to another?
- Do I have a system to remind me to do frequent attitude checks?
- Are there quick ways to assume an attitude?
- Do I have a default attitude?
- Do I seperate feelings & attitudes?
- Whare are some ways to get out of an attitude?
- What attitudes in others are fingernails on a blackboard?
- Do any of my current attitudes need to be replaced or will I stay with what I have?
- What attitudes do I want in my life more often?
- What attitudes do I want to avoid?
- Am I aware that feelings can't be controlled & may show up at any time without warning, but that attitudes can be chosen?
- Am I aware that sometimes the choice of an attitude can influence how I feel in the future?



The real conversations required to sustain a relationship are those that get put off for another day. However, they form the seeds of new growth. Commitment comes at the beginning of a great relationship.



Life Partners

1) Someone with whom to share life's little treasures
2) A shoulder to cry on when life overwhelms us & a voice to remind us of the positive futures possible in times of doubt
3) A best friend
4) Someone who knows us, warts & all & still loves us
5) A lover with whom sex is an impt part - but only a part - of intimacy
6) A ready hug

General Discussion Questions

1) What does it mean for us to have a conversation that is real & fierce?
2) Are there subjects we have been avoiding?
3) What is our vision for this family, partnership or friendship?
4) What are we creating with our life together?
5) How can we help each other stay in the present?
6) What attitudes would we like to have present in our life together & what are some ways we can make that happen?
7) Whare are the 7 basic values that sit at the heart of the life we are building?
- Inventory their presence and proportion in your life
- Does their presence & proportion match your sense of appropriate balance? Would you like to see more or less emphasis on any of these values?
- Discuss goals for the next year / 6 mths / day
- Review